Unresolution

This is so fucked up. I actually missed that damn guy today. And then I got home and realized I had left my earrings at his place. Shades of Grey. I should stop leaving them lying around. So I went over and picked them up and he hugged me and it felt good and I buckled just a tiny bit. But I left my car running, refused to park it and go upstairs so we stood outside in the rain while he tried to convince me we should give it another go. Really really fucked up. I made one concession that he could call me tomorrow. No goodbye kiss. He's as bullheaded as his astrological sign. He called while I was driving home. Maybe he just thinks he can persuade me to have sex with him again. I hope I don't make that mistake again.

On a more positive note, I met with my supervisors today and they had some solutions to help with the lab issues. We're going to fix things tomorrow morning and start working on the next - and hopefully final - experiment.

Why can't my personal life be as easily managed as my professional life? What am I doing wrong? Perhaps it comes down to lack of qualifications, experience and mentoring.