Friday, December 19, 2008

It's been a month...

If a booty call is pre-arranged, is it still a booty call?

I just got home from Grey's. He was in a very good mood yesterday which was nice. Not drunk and not (very) high. I made him laugh a lot. I don't think he appreciates that. He did seem to appreciate the effort it took for me to find and actually wear a matching set of white lace underwear instead of my usual 100% cotton schtuff imported from M&S and VS full coverage IPEX bra. I can't help it though. Lace is itchy and cotton is comfy. Plus, you can just throw it in the laundry. There has to be a reason that men don't wear lace. Why should I have to wear it?

Anyway, I told him it was his Christmas present. And then we had a discussion about how December sucks and we both wish Christmas would disappear. But that, as long as there are kids to open presents, there will always be Christmas. Apparently he's buying toboggans for his nieces this year. I can only imagine how thrilled his brother and sister-in-law will be when he shows up with those next week.

He's looking forward to 11-course Chinese banquet at the wedding tomorrow. We talked about how I haven't taken a date to a wedding in 5 years. 5! And that he's not a real date anyway. Because I don't have to babysit him, make sure he has a drink at all times, have polite conversation and be nice to each other. Why ruin a good thing, right? Sometimes it's hard for me to maintain this tough girl act. I'm an affectionate person in relationships and his nickname for me, "suction cup", is appropriate. But for some reason he doesn't respond to that. I think he actually prefers to be the affectionate, cuddly one. We cuddled a lot last night and this morning. It was nice. It was nice to hold hands and fall asleep together. To be spooned and do the spooning.

So how do I find me a guy that wants to do those things and actually go on dates and talk and stuff? Sheesh, if I had known it would be this hard to find a new relationship, I would have stayed with X for another 7 years in Tibet. Actually, I really wouldn't have. This arrangement seems to be working out just fine for now. And he didn't completely freak out when I proposed living with him in April which is remarkable. But the more I think about it, the less I want to live with him. I'm really going to start looking for a cheaper place to live in the new year.

First though, nap time. I don't sleep well with others.


Asshat said...

That post got thinking.

I think a booty call requires a little spontaneity.

A pre-arranged booty call is called a "date."

Living with someone with whom you have occasional sex but no intense emotional connection is called "a typical marriage."

Do you really want to see your men in lace?

Are you sure your derivation of the nickname "suction cup" is correct?

Elusive Butterfly said...

Oh Asshat, you never fail to make me LOL. And yes, according to Grey, the etymology of the nickname "suction cup" has more to do with affectionate behaviour than... um, well we all know what you're thinking! But thanks for the thought, I do appreciate it and I will pass it onto him tomorrow. He'll have a good laugh.

As for the lack of intense emotional connection, I wouldn't say the emotion is lacking but the intensity has definitely subsided. So you're saying that Grey and I are basically married? I might not tell him that. Well, maybe I will, just to push his buttons a bit ;)

Anonymous said...

Maybe you don't currently have exactly what you want, but at least you have something, right? I mean, after all, at least a little warmth and human contact is better than nothing, day after day, wouldn't you agree?