Sunday, September 21, 2008

Drinking chocolate grappa sex

I had this whole rant in my head about how men are useless with words. However, it has disappeared. Partly because I'm pooped. And more because the three men that read my blog occasionally are not useless with words. So posting a rant about how men are useless with words here would be useless.

I was talking to A about all the things we have been told by men in relationships. And how useless all of those things have turned out to be. But I was lying on the couch in the dark with my feet higher than my head so those factors may have contributed to my wobbly brain.

Also, I had two drinks right before my painkiller so I could be high in addition to being exhausted. The martini was decent but OH.MY.GOD.CHOCOLATE.GRAPPA is my new FAVOURITEST.THING.EVER! It was like drinking sex.

It is more accurately known as Bottega Gianduia Grappa.

Let me be clear. This stuff is not like the horrendous creme de cacao. This was like drinking melted chocolate with flair. Imagine yourself drinking fondue from a shot glass and getting a little unexpected extra.... Yes ladies, it was sex in a shot glass!

Tomorrow morning I am going to the liquor store to buy me a bottle. Or seven. Then I am going to Home Depot to pick up light bulbs and a new faucet for the bathroom sink. I'm told that it's a great place to meet men on Sunday morning.

If I come back with CHOCOLATE GRAPPA, I will be happy. If I come back with a good looking and useful man who will replace aforementioned light bulbs and faucet, I will be ecstatic.

I keep typing CHOCOLATEGRAPPY. I must be high.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

I had to read that a couple of times before I figured out that you weren't going to try to meet men in the liquor store. Yeah, you can meet men in the liquor store in the morning, but you'd probably not want to take them home.

At Home Depot, I suggest you avoid any man with a cell phone. Any such man probably is tethered to a woman whom he will call to consult as to faucet details and light bulb wattage. Chances are he fucked it up the first time and got sent back to the store to do it correctly.

Anonymous said...

Would you like to come over and drink? I could really use a drinking buddy right about now...

Ms Behaviour said...

Hi GH, thanks for stopping by. Just a bit of coincidental trivia, but GH are the initials of my X of 7 years in Tibet.

And yes, I could really use a drink right now. Anything to get me away from the monster that is my thesis!

SaneAndSingle said...

I'll take a shot of sex please!

I've heard the Home Depot=single men myth, but all I ever see is men with wives there!

Alexandreena said...

Chocolate grappa! Must get myself some of that NOW!!!!
Sex in a shot glass- how intriguing.

Ms Behaviour said...

Well I'm told that the key is Sunday morning because the ones with wives and kids are at home on Sunday mornings. I think the theory is that single men with homes go to HD on Sunday AMs. I'll let you know how that goes!

Ms Behaviour said...

Come over girlfriend and bring your new shoes! We'll have a party :)

Unknown said...

I have a question for you...have you made any cocktails with chocolate grappa?

Ms Behaviour said...

Nope, no cocktails. Just chocolate grappa in a small (ice wine or shot) glass. Sometimes chilled, sometimes over ice. Always good. Just remember to shake well before pouring.