Sunday, May 10, 2009

Being a girl

GH suggested I turn these two lists into a blog entry so here it is. There was some sort of context related to my mother slamming my choice of wedding attire vs. the outfits I wore to my ex-boyfriend's ordination and reception today. (Please no wisecracks about my ex becoming a priest! We dated 14 years ago so it's ancient history).

The reason I prefer to wear a sari over a dress:

1. No hair removal (waxing, shaving, other godawful crap like that)
2. No pantyhose or thongs (ick). I accidentally bought a Lululemon thong this week and it was $14. $14!!! For butt floss!!! Augh.
3. No control top underwear or Spanx to suck and tuck in the jelly rolls. Control top is heinous.
4. I can eat as much as I want and just hike it up a bit when it starts to get tight ;)
5. I have a lot of saris and very few occasions to wear them.
6. I have like maybe 4 dresses. I never wear them. I don't feel comfortable in them. I don't know why.
7. They're much prettier than dresses.
8. I'm non-traditional in just about all respects so it's fun to dress traditionally when I'm around people who know my personality.
9. You can get away with fancier jewelry.
10. Nobody notices hair or make up or manicures or pedicures. So overall less work.

Now, the things that are bad about saris:

1. I don't *really* know how to put them on so they have a tendency to fall off when I dress myself.
2. It's nearly impossible (for me) to drive when wearing one
3. I can't walk as fast as I normally walk
4. Going to the bathroom is a giant pain in the ass (for me)
5. It's hard to dance
6. There's a lot of fabric (~30 yards) so it can get hot under there!

So today I went to church in the morning and then to the reception in the evening. For some reason, I thought it would be smart to shave my legs and wear a skirt. In the thunderstorms and hail. My toes were numb after standing in church for 2 hours. It was a full Catholic mass and then some. Augh.

This evening, I wore a black dress. I had to wear a thong. Friggin' hell those things are uncomfortable! I should have worn flats but I wore heels. Thankfully, Baby and Robert dragged me out but we couldn't get into The Courthouse so I was home and in my pjs before midnight. I'm going to bed right now.


geekhiker said...

A female friend (okay, I had the hots for her) once told me the happiest decision she ever made was to skip the thong altogether. Unfortunately, she wasn't willing to prove it to me that she'd done so!

Elusive Butterfly said...

Um, yeah, I have had girlfriends do the same but I was sober and I don't think I could bring myself to do that even if I was high and wasted! It just seems so... slutty?

Awkward, for you said...

You know what? Try a G-String. I know i know, less fabric. However, i find that it's far more comfortable. That little triangle at the top of a thong does nothing, so why have it there? Go to La Senza and pick up an inexpensive G-string. I can almost guarantee you'll prefer it to a thong.