Go play outside

I have a headache.

I went to a class at the gym that makes me want to puke. I'm not sure if it's because I overdid it or because I need to wear ear plugs. The Britney-esque instructor is a cheerleader from Alabama. I just wish she would lip sync too. She does little to motivate me but I didn't think of it until I looked at the clock and realized there was only 15 minutes left in the class. Then I really powered it up.

Also, BO Man apparently takes this class. Gross. I kept thinking it was me. I overheard some of the other girls saying they thought it was them too. That's how pervasive it was. Nasty. Maybe that's why the headache.

Speaking of the gym, check out this ScarJo article from my pants buddy, Awkward.

Listen, I'm not a fan of ScarJo but thank the stars for sensible celebs who write these things. If you don't have time for the whole thing, at the very least the third paragraph. 14 pounds = 2 heads!

I get that people want to be skinny. Hell, I want to be skinny! It's not nice to be called "chubby" by a virtual stranger (drunk stranger, but whatever, still hurts). But it's never going to happen. In order for me to be skinny, I would have to lose 10 pounds. Not going to happen. I need my cranium because my brain is just about the only thing going for me. Plus, I like having enough muscle strength to stand up and get out of bed in the morning. Snort.

Baby keeps trying to lose weight and, when she works out, she burns it like a high performance gasoline engine. We're talking 700 calories in 45 minutes on the elliptical. Her legs move so fast I can't even see them. She normally eats a lot because hot damn that girl's metabolism is high. She started depriving herself a few weeks ago and got sick. I think she was doing that because she's in Cali this week. Anyway, she started eating normally again and felt better. I told her to focus on the parts of her body she's unhappy with instead of trying to lose weight. That's why I go to pirates class. At least if I'm actively working on the rumblytummyblobmonster, I won't spend so much time feeling hideous when I look in the mirror. Right? Right.