Didn't hear from Grey all weekend. Then he texted me this morning to ask when was a good time to talk. When I finally called him in the afternoon, he was aloof and quiet. I guess it wasn't a good time. I give up.

C le V was great this weekend though. Thoughtful, considerate, sensitive, funny, careful and quite generous in bed. We resolved nothing but at least we have established there is something. I won't see him again until March because he's going to Colombia in February. I do miss him already. His presence was comforting. On Saturday late afternoon, we just lay in bed talking and napping. At one point, he turned his head to look at me and I asked him why he was looking at me like that. "I was just checking to make sure you were okay." Good answer! Today after dim sum he decided to spend the afternoon with his buddy but we didn't get a hug goodbye. He rectified that by coming to my place before going to the train station. When I drove him to the train station, we stood in the elevator and I put my arms around him and my head on his chest. It was nice to just stand there and be held.

It was nice to be with a man who can admit that he has feelings for me and is happy to just be with me. Who isn't afraid to go out in public with me. Who doesn't get scared when I get upset. Who runs after me when I run away. His maturity and attitude towards me and life and the world are like a breath of fresh air.

Plus he has a dorky sense of humour. He told me that he doesn't go to church because he doesn't believe God exists and anyway He is a jerk. Which was meant to be, and is, ridiculous. Because if God doesn't exist, he can't be a jerk. And if he's a jerk, then He must exist. His response to that? "Well, either way there's no point going to church." We're both going straight to hell.

Also, he and his buddy picked up his buddy's guitar and his buddy's girlfriend's sewing machine. They were walking down the sidewalk and C le V said, "singer and songwriter". Snort!